Census Bloodbath: Sure burned my beans bad on that one

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE PART 2

The Eighth (oh God) Annual Great October Switcheroo!  Once again, we're crossing over with the wonderful Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture and sometimes Alternate Ending, and I'm doing some of the 80s slashers he's catalogued as part of his Census Bloodbath project, while he's doing some of the old-timey sci-fi I've been hoarding as part of my own Cardboard Science archive.  This year, he finally gave me three pieces of the slasher genre's major arcana, such as I've been very subtly and surreptitiously hinting that I'd like to do this whole time; in return, I accidentally gave him three pieces of indecent crap.  Oops!  (But, seriously, apologies.)

1986

Directed by Tobe Hooper

Written by L.M. Kit Carson

Spoiler alert: moderate

Steven Spielberg, part IX: But I barely know her geist!

POLTERGEIST

Not the father of all haunted house movies, but more like their richer, cooler stepdad, Poltergeist is where the modern haunting movie came into its own—for better or worse, there's no Blumhouse without the Freeling house.  More importantly, however, it's also one of the best of its particular breed, still incredibly frightening (and still visually resplendent) to this very day.

1982

Directed by somebody! maybe it was you!

Written by Steven Spielberg, Michael Grais, and Mark Victor

With JoBeth Williams (Diane Freeling), Craig T. Nelson (Steve Freeling), Oliver Robins (Robbie Freeling), Heather O'Rourke (Carol Anne Freeling), Beatrice Straight (Dr. Lesh), and Zelda Rubinstein (Tangina)

Spoiler alert: moderate

Note: this is a re-edited version of a review posted in November 2014.  I have expanded the discussion, partly to include Poltergeist's production history, but mostly to more deeply explore the infamous controversy over who "really" directed the film, an issue which cannot be so easily brushed aside in the context of a career retrospective.  Obviously, if you're up to speed already, please feel free to skip to the actual review.  You can tell when it starts, because it's where that dude's face awesomely falls off.

John Carpenter, part XXI: Do you like EC Comics? Well, I know someone who does

BODY BAGS

Hey, it's not like Tales From the Crypt was all that great, either.

1993

Directed by John Carpenter ("The Gas Station," "Hair"), Tobe Hooper ("The Eye"), and Larry Sulkis (something, apparently)

Written by Billy Brown and Dan Angel

With...

"The Gas Station": Alex Datcher (Anne) and Robert Carradine (Bill)

"Hair": Stacey Keach (Richard Coberts), Sheena Easton (Megan), and David Warner (Dr. Lock)

"The Eye": Mark Hamill (Brent Matthews), Twiggy (Cathy Matthews), and John Agar (Dr. Lang)

...along with your host, John Carpenter (The Coroner)

Spoiler alert: mild

Catching up with the (super) classics of horror, part I: I barely know her geist

POLTERGEIST

1982
Directed by somebody! maybe it was you!
Written by Steven Spielberg, Michael Grais, and Mark Victor
With Craig T. Nelson (Steve Freeling), JoBeth Williams (Diane Freeling), Oliver Robins (Robbie Freeling), Heather O'Rourke (Carol Anne Freeling), Beatrice Straight (Dr. Lesh), and Zelda Rubinstein (Tangina)

We've all missed movies that we should've seen.  Here are three of mine, that might surprise you.

Spoiler alert: moderate