Wednesday, August 19, 2015

I'm a sweet pennsvestite from Pennsexual Pennsylvania

No longer am I South Carolina's preeminent film critic.  I am now a resident of Pittsburgh, PA, which is so far about what I expected: murderous to run in due to the hilly terrain, effectively hotter than Columbia because these barbarians haven't discovered air conditioning technology yet, and full of the worst drivers and pedestrians I've ever seen in my whole life.  But I'll get used to it!  Meanwhile, my girlfriend is getting a sweet fully-paid doctorate at CMU, so that's rad.

So, yes, I have survived a move of many miles, but as for Internet, who can say? Service will resume with gusto soon, but until then, know that I live, and I'm finally taking that vacation I've needed for over a year, watching some pretty swell movies in the meantime.

I'll catch you on the flipside, chums.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Impossible Week, part V: Hunt is the living manifestation of destiny, and he has made you his mission!


MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE—ROGUE NATION

Is this the end of the Impossible series?  $267 million and counting argues no: but the beginning of its end, it may well be.

2015
Directed by Christopher McQuarrie
Written by Drew Pearce and Christopher McQuarrie
With Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Rebecca Ferguson (Ilsa Faust), Simon Pegg (Benji Dunn), Ving Rhames (Luther Stickell), Alec Baldwin (Alan Hunley)

Spoiler alert: mild

Monday, August 10, 2015

Impossible Week, part IV: And I'll catch you!


MISSION: IMPOSSIBLEGHOST PROTOCOL

As the Impossible series continues to take new, strange forms, we turn now to Brad Bird's live action debut—in many ways, the finest animated feature he ever made.

2011
Directed by Brad Bird
Written by
With Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Simon Pegg (Benji Dunn), Paula Patton (Jane Carter), Jeremy Renner (William Brandt), Miraj Grbic (Bodgan), Lea Seydoux (Sabine Moreau), Michelle Monaghan (Julia Hunt), and Michael Nyqvist (Cobalt)

Spoiler alert: high

Sunday, August 9, 2015

Impossible Week, part III: I'll die unless you kill me!


MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III

You've laughed, you've cried, and you've seen them fall in lovebut can Ethan and Julia Hunt survive the world's worst honeymoon?  Tune in and find out.

2006
Directed by J.J. Abrams
Written by Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci, and J.J. Abrams
With Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Michelle Monaghan (Julia Hunt), Ving Rhames (Luther Stickell), Keri Russell (Lindsey Farris), Maggie Q (Zhen Lei), Jonathan Rhys Davies (Declan Gormley), Simon Pegg (Benji Dunn), Billy Crudup (John Musgrave), Laurence Fishburne (Theodore Brassel), and Philip Seymour Hoffman (Owen Davian)

Spoiler alert: severe

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Impossible Week, part II: Just stay alive! I'm not going to lose you!


MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE II

What if Notorious had explosions and kind of sucked?  At the turn of the millennium, Tom Cruise and John Woo answered the question no one asked, and for some reason, we all really loved it at the time.

2000
Directed by John Woo
Written by Robert Towne, Ronald D. Moore, and Brannon Braga
With Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Thandie Newton (Nyah Nordoff-Hall), Anthony Hopkins (Mission Commander Swanbeck), Ving Rhames (Luther Stickell), Dougray Scott (Sean Ambrose), Richard Roxburgh (Hugh Stamp), and Brendan Gleeson (John C. McCloy)

Spoiler alert: high

Sunday, August 2, 2015

Impossible Week, part I: Red light! Green light!


MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE

The collision of one of our greatest actors with one of our greatest directors produces one of the greatest spy films of them all.  Funny how that works.

1996
Directed by Brian De Palma
Written by David Koepp, Steve Zaillian, and Robert Towne (based on the show created by Bruce Geller)
With Tom Cruise (Ethan Hunt), Jon Voight (Jim Phelps), Emmanuelle Beart (Claire Phelps), Ving Rhames (Luther Stickell), Jean Reno (Franz Krieger), Kristin Scott Thomas (Sarah Davies), Emilio Estevez (Jack Harmon), Ingeborga Dapkunaite (Hannah Williams), Henry Czerny (Eugene Kittridge), and Vanessa Redgrave (Max)

Spoiler alert: severe, because the twists are rad