Kill all Ken

BARBIE

2023

Directed by Greta Gerwig

Written by Noah Baumbach and Greta Gerwig

Spoilers: high

Ill-disposed in brawl ridiculous, the name of Agincourt

HENRY V

1989

Written and directed by Kenneth Branagh (based on the play The Life of Henry the Fifth by William Shakespeare)

Spoilers: N/A (why's there no play about the Siege of Orléans?)

He's a mind-reading, shape-shifting incarnation of chaos!

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE-DEAD RECKONING, PART ONE

2023

Directed by Christopher McQuarrie

Written by Erik Jendresen and Christopher McQuarrie

Spoilers: moderate

Digitally release the kraken

RUBY GILLMAN, TEENAGE KRAKEN

2023

Directed by Kirk DiMicco (co-directed by Faryn Pearl)

Written by Pam Brady, Brian C. Brown, and Elliott Giuseppe

Spoilers: moderate

The Encyclopedia Brown: Those magnificent men in their flying machines

NIGHT FLIGHT

1933

Directed by Clarence Brown

Written by Oliver H.P. Garrett, John Monk Saunders, and Wells Root (based on the novel by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry)

Spoilers: moderate

The Encyclopedia Brown: How about a little Service?

LOOKING FORWARD

1933

Directed by Clarence Brown

Written by Bess Meredyth and H.M. Harwood (based on the play Service by Dodie Smith)

Spoilers: moderate

The Encyclopedia Brown: Hey, that's pretty progressive for... oh

THE SON-DAUGHTER

1932

Directed by Clarence Brown

Written by John F. Goodrich, Claudine West, and Leon Gordon (based on the play by George Scarborough and David Belasco)

Spoilers: moderate

The Encyclopedia Brown: But we are together, aren't we? And I doubt that you will scream, or alarm the neighbors

LETTY LYNTON

1932

Directed by Clarence Brown

Written by Wanda Tuchok and John Meehan (based on the novel by Marie Belloc Lownes and the play Dishonored Lady by Edward Sheldon and Margaret Ayer Barnes)

Spoilers: highish, inasmuch as I refer to the details of the real-life criminal case and the copyright infringement litigation resulting in this film's unusual legal status

Update 7/15/2023: I was way off on certain details of another film's legal status, which I have now corrected, though I find my initial error incredibly embarrassing

Who knows, in a thousand years, even you may be worth something

INDIANA JONES AND THE DIAL OF DESTINY

2023

Directed by James Mangold

Written by Jez Butterworth, John Henry Butterworth, David Koepp, and James Mangold

Spoilers: severe, and I'm also going to let it run a little long

It's elementary

ELEMENTAL

2023

Directed by Peter Sohn

Written by John Hoburg, Kat Likkel, Brenda Hseuh, and Peter Sohn

Spoilers: moderate

Smells like teen spirit

TEEN TITANS GO! TO THE MOVIES

2018

Directed by Peter Rida Michail and Aaron Horvath

Written by Michael Jelenic and Aaron Horvath

Spoilers: moderate, or high if you don't already know who Deathstroke the Terminator is

For want of a can

THE FLASH

2023

Directed by Andy Muschietti

Written by Christina Hodson, John Francis Daley, Jonathan Goldstein, and Joby Howard

Spoilers: moderate (unless cameos are spoilers to you, you loser)