The Fall of the House of Nathan

EX MACHINA

This is throwback science fiction, the way it was meant to be made.

2015
Written and directed by Alex Garland
With Alicia Vikander (Ava), Domnhall Gleeson (Caleb Smith), Oscar Isaac (Nathan Bateman), and Sonoya Mizuno (Kyoko)

Spoiler alert: mild

Putting the "list" in "miserablist!" (or, the films of David Fincher ranked, no. 1)

For going on twenty years now—my how time flies—David Fincher has been our preeminent auteur of gross, depressing tales of murder and mayhem.  Almost uniquely, Fincher has mastered a high-wire balancing act in the thriller genre, crafting films that are formally pristine, morally bracing, thematically insidious, emotionally devastating, and—most important of all—highly entertaining.  Though chiefly noted for this selfsame prediliction toward the pleasantly unpleasant, Fincher has tried his hand at other things, too—one time it was good, one time it was the worst thing ever.  On this episode: marriage.

Spoiler alert: severe (previously discussed in a spoiler-free review here)

Ron's heartworm medication, part II

HARRY POTTER AND THE ____________
Directed by Chris Columbus (1-2), Alfonso Cuaron (3), Mark Newell (4), and David Yates (5-8)
Written by Steve Klove (1-4, 6-8) and Michael Goldenburg (5) (based on the novels by J.K. Rowling)
With the population of Britain—Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter), Emma Watson (Hermione Granger), Rupert Grint (Ron Weasly), Tom Felton (Draco Malfoy), Richard Harris (Prof. Albus Dumbledore, vol. 1), Michael Gambon (Prof. Albus Dumbledore, vol. 2), Robbie Coltrane (Rubeus Hagrid), Alan Rickman (Prof. Severus Snape), Kenneth Branagh (Prof. Gilderoy Lockhart), Gary Oldman (Sirius Black), David Thewlis (Prof. Remus Lupin), Brendon Gleeson (Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody), Jim Broadbent (Prof. Horace Slughorn), Timothy Spall (Wormtail), Maggie Smith (Prof. Minerva MacGonacle), Imelda Staunton (Dolores Umbridge), Helena Bonham Carter (Bellatrix Lestrange), Warwick Davis (various), and Ralph Fiennes (Voldemort)

Spoiler alert: I'm trying to keep it at moderate—God alone knows whom for—but it will unavoidably slip into high in regards the later films

Ron's heartworm medication, part I

HARRY POTTER AND THE ____________
Directed by Chris Columbus (1-2), Alfonso Cuaron (3), Mark Newell (4), and David Yates (5-8)
Written by Steve Klove (1-4, 6-8) and Michael Goldenburg (5) (based on the novels by J.K. Rowling)
With the population of Britain—Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter), Emma Watson (Hermione Granger), Rupert Grint (Ron Weasly), Tom Felton (Draco Malfoy), Richard Harris (Prof. Albus Dumbledore, vol. 1), Michael Gambon (Prof. Albus Dumbledore, vol. 2), Robbie Coltrane (Rubeus Hagrid), Alan Rickman (Prof. Severus Snape), Kenneth Branagh (Prof. Gilderoy Lockhart), Gary Oldman (Sirius Black), David Thewlis (Prof. Remus Lupin), Brendon Gleeson (Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody), Jim Broadbent (Prof. Horace Slughorn), Timothy Spall (Wormtail), Maggie Smith (Prof. Minerva MacGonacle), Imelda Staunton (Dolores Umbridge), Helena Bonham Carter (Bellatrix Lestrange), Warwick Davis (various), and Ralph Fiennes (Voldemort)

Spoiler alert: I'm trying to keep it at moderate—God alone knows whom for—but it will unavoidably slip into high in regards the later films

Cardboard Science: It's long and hard and full of uranium

THE ATOMIC SUBMARINE

Cardboard Science returns!  With a perfectly average B-movie.

1959
Directed by Spencer G. Bennett
Written by Orville H. Hampton
With Arthur Franz (Lt. Cmdr. Richard "Reef" Holloway), Brett Halsey (Dr. Carl Neilson Jr.), Dick Foran (Cmdr. Dan Wendover), Tom Conway (Sir Ian Hunt), Victor Varconi (Dr. Clifford Kent), and John Hilliard (the Voice of the Pilot)

Spoiler alert: high

Nancy Drew in The Secret of the Haunted Vagina

IT FOLLOWS

Exceptional technique meets a great idea, yet somehow the result is only a very good movie.

2015
Written and directed by David Robert Mitchell
With Maika Monroe (Jay),  Keir Gilchrist (Paul), Lili Sepe (Kelly), Olivia Luccardi (Yara), Daniel Zovatto (Greg), and Jake Weary (Hugh)

Spoiler alert: moderate

Putting the "list" in "miserablist"! (or, the films of David Fincher ranked, no. 2)

For going on twenty years now—my how time flies—David Fincher has been our preeminent auteur of gross, depressing tales of murder and mayhem.  Almost uniquely, Fincher has mastered a high-wire balancing act in the thriller genre, crafting films that are formally pristine, morally bracing, thematically insidious, emotionally devastating, and—most important of all—highly entertaining.  Though chiefly noted for this selfsame prediliction toward the pleasantly unpleasant, Fincher has tried his hand at other things, too—one time it was good, one time it was the worst thing ever.  On this episode: murder and mayhem!

Spoiler alert: moderate