And the sixth element, it turns out, is poop

VALERIAN AND THE CITY OF A THOUSAND PLANETS

The Death of Story continues, but Valerian offers more than story.  It gives us a heaping helping of gorgeously wonderful (and gloriously stupid) visuals, too.  You can call it good, if you want to; but it's sort of beyond that type of categorization.

2017

Written and directed by Luc Besson

With Dane DeHaan (Valerian), Cara Delevingne (Laureline), Sasha Luss (Princess Liho-Minaa), Rihanna (Bubble), Ethan Hawke (Jolly the Pimp), John Goodman (Igon Siruss), and Clive Owen (Commander Arun Filitt)

Spoiler alert: moderate

The road to unwellville

A CURE FOR WELLNESS

As with much of Verbinski's latterday live-action output, it seems, there's a theoretical 90 minute cut of this that's probably pretty great.  But what I actually watched sure as hell wasn't.

2017

Directed by Gore Verbinski

Written by Justin Haythe and Gore Verbinski

With Dane DeHaan (Lockhart), Mia Goth (Hannah), Harry Groener (Pembroke), and Jason Isaacs (Volmer)

Spoiler alert: mild

The amazing web of the spectacular Spider-Man unlimited, part V: Electro Max likes electro music

In celebration of his fifth cinematic iteration, this series of reviews is devoted to the only arachnid I wouldn't scream at and kill with poison.  Here comes the Spider-Man!  

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2

Amazing 2 represents a return in many respects to the kitchen-sink narrative of Spider-Man 3—and flawed it may be, deeply so, but there is true finesse here as well.  With an affecting climax that underlines exactly why this reconception of the franchise is so much more solid than the last, this film is also so stylistically insane that you could call it The Musically Audacious Spider-Man.  Its strengths are too strong to understate the matter, and I don't hesitate to go against the grain all the way: it's not only not the terrible movie you've no doubt heard it was, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is the best Spider-Man film yet.

2014
Directed by Marc Webb
Written by Alex Kurtzmann, Roberto Orci, Jeff Pinkner, and James Vanderbilt
With Andrew Garfield (Peter Parker), Emma Stone (Gwen Stacy), Denis Leary (Capt. Stacy), Sally Field (May Parker), Jamie Foxx (Max Dillon), and Dane DeHaan (Harry Osborn) (for realsies this time)

Spoiler alert: high