Kinemalogue: October 2024

Thursday, October 31, 2024

Census Bloodbath: Sleep out with your peep out

SLEEPAWAY CAMP

It's Halloween again, and you know what that means. Like every year, we resurrect Brennan Klein over at Popcorn Culture for our October Switcheroo! Sometimes I win, sometimes he loses, but either way, it means Brennan trapped in our own Cardboard Science format and reviewing 50s sci-fi classics or not-so-classics, while I wear his face for a while with some 80s slashers, Census Bloodbath-style.

1983

Written and directed by Robert Hiltzick

Spoilers: extraordinarily severe; or, everybody already knows anyway; or, I'm not sure, but you've been warned

Nightmare Week meets Friday Week: The only thing to fear is fear himself; or Dude, that goalie was pissed about something

FREDDY VS. JASON

2003

Directed by Ronny Yu

Written by Damian Shannon and Mark Swift

Spoilers: severe

Friday Week: Jason fucking Voorhees, that's what's going on

JASON X

2002

Directed by Jim Isaac

Written by Todd Farmer

Spoilers: high

Nightmare Week: I don't know why you like these stupid old fairy tales

WES CRAVEN'S NEW NIGHTMARE

1994

Written and directed by Wes Craven

Spoilers: high

Friday Week: In a Voorhees was he born, through a Voorhees may he be reborn, and only by the hands of a Voorhees will he die

JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY

1993

Directed by Adam Marcus and Sean Cunningham

Written by Dean Lorey, Jay Huguely, and Adam Marcus

Spoilers: high

Nightmare Week: Every town has an Elm Street

FREDDY'S DEAD: THE FINAL NIGHTMARE

1991

Directed by Rachel Talalay

Written by Michael De Luca and Rachel Talalay

Spoilers: see above (high)

Nightmare Week: Hi Alice, wanna make babies?

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 5: THE DREAM CHILD

1989

Directed by Stephen Hopkins

Written by Leslie Boehm, John Skipp, and Craig Spector

Spoilers: moderate

Friday Week: Trapped by dark waters, there is no escape—nor do we want it

FRIDAY THE 13th PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN

1989

Written and directed by Rob Hedden

Spoiler alert: moderate

Note: though based on a fresh watch, this is a re-edited-more-than-I'd-have-liked version of an earlier review written in connection with my annual Halloween-time crossover with Brennan Klein (rarely these days of Popcorn Culture, more commonly of Alternate Ending). My hopes were to barely change it. My hopes were dashed, given that significant stretches would have been redundant with things we've already covered in previous entries (particularly my grand unified theories of Friday the 13th criticism), while a lot was simply performative whining that only makes sense in the context of Brennan having control over the programming. The original will, of course, remain, and it has a lot of neat slasher flick errata insofar as the crossover concept demands I ape the format of Brennan's impiously encyclopedic Census Bloodbath series of 80s slasher film reviews, which I obviously recommend.