Census Bloodbath: Faces bright with Christmas fever

SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT

Thirteen Halloweens.  That's sinister, don't you think?  And that's how long we've been crossing over with Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture in the Old Switcheroo, where for the duration of October he supplements his ever-burgeoning encyclopedia of the slasher, Census Bloodbath, with a takeover of our own wholesome 50s sci-fi feature, Cardboard Science, while I get the sharper end of that bargain here.

1984

Directed by Charles E. Sellier Jr

Written by Paul Caimi, Dennis Whitehead, Scott J. Schneid, and Michael Hickey

Spoilers: moderate

Census Bloodbath: I know what you did last prom night

PROM NIGHT

Thirteen Halloweens.  That's sinister, don't you think?  And that's how long we've been crossing over with Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture in the Old Switcheroo, where for the duration of October he supplements his ever-burgeoning encyclopedia of the slasher, Census Bloodbath, with a takeover of our own wholesome 50s sci-fi feature, Cardboard Science, while I get the sharper end of that bargain here.

1980

Directed by Paul Lynch

Written by Robert Guza Jr, William Gray, and John Hunter

Spoilers: man, you could say "moderate," you could say "high," but I would say "it doesn't matter much anyway"

That Age is best, which is the first, when Youth and Blood are warmer

TEENAGE SEX AND DEATH AT CAMP MIASMA

2026

Written and directed by Jane Schoenbrun

Spoilers: high

John Denver Appreciation Week: I wasn't supposed to be there, except, of course, to die

FINAL DESTINATION BLOODLINES

2025

Directed by Zach Lipovsky and Adam Stein

Written by John Watts, Gary Busick, and Lori Evans Taylor

Spoilers: moderate

John Denver Appreciation Week: There's a wrinkle in reality, and that wrinkle is you

FINAL DESTINATION 5

2011

Directed by Steven Quale

Written by Eric Heisserer

Spoilers: oh, severe, I guess

John Denver Appreciation Week: What if us being here, right now, was the plan from the beginning?

THE FINAL DESTINATION

2009

Directed by David R. Ellis

Written by Eric Bress

Spoilers: moderate

John Denver Appreciation Week: We are all equal in Death's eyes

FINAL DESTINATION 3

2006

Directed by James Wong

Written by Glen Morgan and James Wong

Spoilers: moderate

John Denver Appreciation Week: People are always most alive just before they die—don't you think?

FINAL DESTINATION 2

2003

Directed by David R. Ellis

Written by Jeffrey Reddick, J. Mackye Gruber, and Eric Bress

Spoilers: high

John Denver Appreciation Week: Your friend's departure shows that Death has a new design for all of you

FINAL DESTINATION

2000

Directed by James Wong

Written by Jeffrey Reddick, Glen Morgan, and James Wong

Spoilers: surprisingly moderate

Census Bloodbath: Hello, nurse

VISITING HOURS

It's Halloween again, and for our 12th annual Switcheroo with Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture, we're doing what we always do this time of year when we turn the tables on one another: he takes over my Cardboard Science feature and reviews some of those corny mid-century sci-fi movies, and I do some fieldwork for Brennan's Census Bloodbath, as he gives me a slate of sick 80s slasher flicks from his ever-expanding encyclopedia of death.  This year we're back to full power, with three psyche-scarring films of Brennan's selection.

1982

Directed by Jean-Claude Lord

Written by Brian Taggert

Spoilers: moderate

Census Bloodbath: This is a tool, not a toy

THE CARPENTER

It's Halloween again, and for our 12th annual Switcheroo with Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture, we're doing what we always do this time of year when we turn the tables on one another: he takes over my Cardboard Science feature and reviews some of those corny mid-century sci-fi movies, and I do some fieldwork for Brennan's Census Bloodbath, as he gives me a slate of sick 80s slasher flicks from his ever-expanding encyclopedia of death.  This year we're back to full power, with three psyche-scarring films of Brennan's selection.

1988

Directed by David Wellington

Written by Doug Taylor

Spoilers: moderate

Census Bloodbath: You have a 20th century mind—you may soon regret it

SUPERSTITION

aka The Witch

It's Halloween again, and for our 12th annual Switcheroo with Brennan Klein of Popcorn Culture, we're doing what we always do this time of year when we turn the tables on one another: he takes over my Cardboard Science feature and reviews some of those corny mid-century sci-fi movies, and I do some fieldwork for Brennan's Census Bloodbath, as he gives me a slate of sick 80s slasher flicks from his ever-expanding encyclopedia of death.  This year we're back to full power, with three psyche-scarring films of Brennan's selection.

1985

Directed by James W. Roberson

Written by Michael O. Sajbel, Bret Thompson Plate, Brad White, and Donald G. Thompson

Spoilers: moderate

The clown is down: It's just me and you, remember? It's just me and you, and we're in the same business—we make people happy

TERRIFIER 3

2024

Written and directed by Damien Leone

Spoilers: moderate

The clown is down: Look, I get it, dude, the whole creepy silent mime gimmick? I mean, it's very effective—and the blood is a nice touch also

TERRIFIER 2

2022

Written and directed by Damien Leone

Spoilers: moderate (at least I don't think it's high)

The clown is down: Is there any kindness in you—somewhere in your heart?

TERRIFIER

2018

Written and directed by Damien Leone

Spoilers: moderate

The clown is down: See, it's just a scary movie

ALL HALLOWS' EVE

2013

Written and directed by Damien Leone

Spoilers: moderate

Nightmare Week: How's this for a wet dr... wait

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET

2010

Directed by Samuel Bayer

Written by Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer

Spoilers: high

Friday Week: Say hi to mommy in hell

FRIDAY THE 13th

2009

Directed by Marcus Nispel

Written by Mark Wheaton, Damian Shannon, and Mark Swift

Spoilers: high

Census Bloodbath: Sleep out with your peep out

SLEEPAWAY CAMP

It's Halloween again, and you know what that means.  Like every year, we resurrect Brennan Klein over at Popcorn Culture for our October Switcheroo!  Sometimes I win, sometimes he loses, but either way, it means Brennan trapped in our own Cardboard Science format and reviewing 50s sci-fi classics or not-so-classics, while I wear his face for a while with some 80s slashers, Census Bloodbath-style.

1983

Written and directed by Robert Hiltzick

Spoilers: extraordinarily severe; or, everybody already knows anyway; or, I'm not sure, but you've been warned

Nightmare Week meets Friday Week: The only thing to fear is fear himself; or Dude, that goalie was pissed about something

FREDDY VS. JASON

2003

Directed by Ronny Yu

Written by Damian Shannon and Mark Swift

Spoilers: severe